Walking with a 3-year old makes you do strange things. Things you would never imagine doing.
Me? Pick up bugs? With my own bare hands? Are you kidding?
Me? Scooping up dead fish that some kids had scaled and whose eyes they popped out and then put back in the lake to rot and gingerly disposing of it in a nearby garbage? Unthinkable!
But, a little boy is enough to make you swallow any sense of utter disgust just for the sake of a squeal of youthful joy. So, I bravely put my hand on the ground. Willing and ready for the fuzzy little thing to crawl aboard. I was game and ready.
Only problem is that it wasn't! It sniffed and decided that mine was not the hand to travel upon. It dared disobey and started to turn it's head. Now I was determined. I delicately lifted it and placed it on my hand. I was ever so proud and the little guy was delighted.
The caterpillar was not delighted. It curled up into a ball that got ever tighter when the miniature man in the stroller reached to feel the little orange hairs standing on edge with alarm. Then it pooed.
My virgin hand now held much more than a relative of Arabella Miller's favorite pet. A little trail of green slime from the petrified creature that I had disturbed on its way to the other side of the street. I wonder if I tried to pick up a chicken if I would end up with an egg for the same reason.
I probably traumatized the poor thing for the rest of its life. Fly little future butterfly. Fly. I'm sorry to have troubled you...
... well, no. Not really. You're a caterpillar and though you might have been terrified we meant you no harm and made a little person's eyes light up with wonder and joy for a few seconds. So, thanks and have a nice life.
I'm just glad people were watering their lawn not too far away and didn't mind my asking to rinse of my hand.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
What to do about a dripping tap in the middle of the night
So, the other day I had a cup of coffee. Okay, I had one yesterday, as well. Can't sleep. Doesn't make it better that sounds of snores and water drips resound throughout the night.
Can't sleep, so I look around. It's dark. Can't see much but instinctively reach for the laptop. It's a make work project. Better than doing something actually useful and feeling proud to have finally accomplished it.
Three hours have passed and the sun is up. Now I can see and still on the laptop but a bit blurry eyed.
Fine. Turning off the laptop and going to do something useful.
Morning, everybody.
Can't sleep, so I look around. It's dark. Can't see much but instinctively reach for the laptop. It's a make work project. Better than doing something actually useful and feeling proud to have finally accomplished it.
Three hours have passed and the sun is up. Now I can see and still on the laptop but a bit blurry eyed.
Fine. Turning off the laptop and going to do something useful.
Morning, everybody.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
How to overcome gay parenting stereotypes
Please forgive this author for attempting to write about this topic despite being neither gay nor professing to own even an inclining as to what a gay parenting stereotype might be. This is why she is perhaps ideally suited to offer advice on the matter. There is only one way to parent a child and that is with love and to bestow on them the best that you have to offer.
A parenting style is unique to each couple. It is the amalgamation of what each has brought in to the relationship. In cases where there is only one parent, it is still the combination of who you were before the child entered your life and the impact of your current relationships, of both the romantic and non-romantic kind.
A person's sexual orientation is just that. Whom you opt to sleep with or be attracted to is a complex formula that has really nothing to do with your child since we are not sexually involved with the child. Nor are we in sexual competition with those that our child may later grow to be attracted to.
So, as Krishanmurti had said, you cannot control what goes on around you, as that is dictated by others. You can only die to them. This is not a physical death. It is a separation between both the good and bad that comes of your interaction with them. You just stop being guided and impacted by judgement. When they can no longer exert an influence on you, you can no longer react to what they say.
This is something like the idea of cyber-bullying. Turn off the computer and you can no longer read the hateful, intimidating messages. All of a sudden there is a healthy ignorance between what they expect you to do and what you feel needs to be done.
What strikes me as most compelling in all of this is that regardless of gay or straight, man or woman, there are so many different types of personalities. A straight couple where the woman is more dominant of the two is just as typical as an over-bearing, perhaps even emotionally abusive male spouse to his demure and long-suffering wife. It is no different from any other collection of individuals who happen to have formed a union.
All of these people, who by hook or crook have managed to become parents must now deal with an additional living soul, perhaps more, in their own right. People are people. The child is a person. Sexual orientation is not what defines a person. It should only define the part of a person that accounts for their carnal lust.
A parenting style is unique to each couple. It is the amalgamation of what each has brought in to the relationship. In cases where there is only one parent, it is still the combination of who you were before the child entered your life and the impact of your current relationships, of both the romantic and non-romantic kind.
A person's sexual orientation is just that. Whom you opt to sleep with or be attracted to is a complex formula that has really nothing to do with your child since we are not sexually involved with the child. Nor are we in sexual competition with those that our child may later grow to be attracted to.
So, as Krishanmurti had said, you cannot control what goes on around you, as that is dictated by others. You can only die to them. This is not a physical death. It is a separation between both the good and bad that comes of your interaction with them. You just stop being guided and impacted by judgement. When they can no longer exert an influence on you, you can no longer react to what they say.
This is something like the idea of cyber-bullying. Turn off the computer and you can no longer read the hateful, intimidating messages. All of a sudden there is a healthy ignorance between what they expect you to do and what you feel needs to be done.
What strikes me as most compelling in all of this is that regardless of gay or straight, man or woman, there are so many different types of personalities. A straight couple where the woman is more dominant of the two is just as typical as an over-bearing, perhaps even emotionally abusive male spouse to his demure and long-suffering wife. It is no different from any other collection of individuals who happen to have formed a union.
All of these people, who by hook or crook have managed to become parents must now deal with an additional living soul, perhaps more, in their own right. People are people. The child is a person. Sexual orientation is not what defines a person. It should only define the part of a person that accounts for their carnal lust.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
2011 Caledon Butterfly Gala for Wellspring Chinguacousy Cancer Support Centre
The most recent issue of SouthFields Village Voice has a really great article written by the editor and, with their permission. They are really hoping that this event will bring awareness for Wellspring so if you are looking for a good time on a Saturday night (i.e. cirque-tacular performance and duel pianos, an open bar and fabulous buffet by Village Bistro, one of Caledon's finest dining establishments), then I'd say $140 bucks is a really good deal for all that. Plus, money raised goes to support Wellspring and the great work they are doing with people going through cancer and their families.
Check out page 3 of the latest issue of SouthFields Village Voice (www.southfieldsvillagevoice.com) for details.
Check out page 3 of the latest issue of SouthFields Village Voice (www.southfieldsvillagevoice.com) for details.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Hypocrisy
Sometimes, I have to admit, I wonder about my own sanity. Everybody does at one point or another. I no more understand the reasons behind some of the things that exit my mouth than the poor people around me. My only excuse is an extreme, self-imposed, lack of sleep. There are reasons behind this but worthy of a different blog entry.
Still, I try to remain true to my word and make every effort to live with integrity. This cannot be said of some of my acquaintances. Even if for self-serving reasons, how self-serving is it to be caught in a blatant lie? Do you really think nobody listens?
Anyway, it is 4:38 in the morning and I am only ranting. More power to ya and it is all fairly harmless at that. I still think you mean well.
In the mean time, I am starting to panic about time, money, health, reputation, self-defeatism, unknown forces and unexpected calamities. As I said in the last post: God give me strength.
Still, I try to remain true to my word and make every effort to live with integrity. This cannot be said of some of my acquaintances. Even if for self-serving reasons, how self-serving is it to be caught in a blatant lie? Do you really think nobody listens?
Anyway, it is 4:38 in the morning and I am only ranting. More power to ya and it is all fairly harmless at that. I still think you mean well.
In the mean time, I am starting to panic about time, money, health, reputation, self-defeatism, unknown forces and unexpected calamities. As I said in the last post: God give me strength.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
God give me strength
Life is awfully short. This is a fact even when you are waiting for what may seem like forever. Before you blink it was yesterday and then even decades ago.
Today, my arm feels numb. An aftershock from my heart tensing up just from the hint of an impending conversation that I did not want to have. A couple of days ago I looked at a photograph taken while I was talking and couldn't believe how old and tired I looked.
The past year has been rough. I know why and at the same time have to wonder if it is worth it. I'm committed now though. So, I have to follow through and all the while have to wonder if I'll last. The undertaking seems to be taking its toll.
Still, I have to keep doing it. This is one of those defining moments. I could stop but I'd be passing up what really is a chance of a lifetime. These are the opportunities you either take or don't and things you'll never likely regret.
I'm starting to worry about money though. Even dreams take financing. That and, as a friend likes to say, bandwidth. I'm low on bandwidth. I need help. I know this. The trick is to find the right help for the right price. Free costs too much and paid is something that is coming ... hopefully.
Anybody got a buck to spare for a dream? That way I can hire some elves.
Today, my arm feels numb. An aftershock from my heart tensing up just from the hint of an impending conversation that I did not want to have. A couple of days ago I looked at a photograph taken while I was talking and couldn't believe how old and tired I looked.
The past year has been rough. I know why and at the same time have to wonder if it is worth it. I'm committed now though. So, I have to follow through and all the while have to wonder if I'll last. The undertaking seems to be taking its toll.
Still, I have to keep doing it. This is one of those defining moments. I could stop but I'd be passing up what really is a chance of a lifetime. These are the opportunities you either take or don't and things you'll never likely regret.
I'm starting to worry about money though. Even dreams take financing. That and, as a friend likes to say, bandwidth. I'm low on bandwidth. I need help. I know this. The trick is to find the right help for the right price. Free costs too much and paid is something that is coming ... hopefully.
Anybody got a buck to spare for a dream? That way I can hire some elves.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Full moon
Don't talk to me about the moon's effect being nonsense. Thursday was all about it. Car accidents, soar, throats, strange conversations, everything getting off the rails.
Religion has it all wrong. We should not be praying at the alter of the sun. It may be responsible for our ability to survive but the moon dictates what happens while we do.
Religion has it all wrong. We should not be praying at the alter of the sun. It may be responsible for our ability to survive but the moon dictates what happens while we do.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)